Ahem.   Hello, there.   Earth to Slow.   Have you lost your mind, you dippy old bat?   What in the hell are you doing with a Rug Doctor, for God’s sake??   Somebody stop her!     She doesn’t know what she’s doing – the daffy woman has just poured the cleaning solution into the Receiving container!   Good grief – she’s a menace.   Now look at her – she’ s trying to figure out why it’s not working – read the directions!!

Oh, well.   I think I’ll take a few runs at it and try to bite the damn thing.   Grrrrrrr…..chomp….grrrrrrr….chomp.   That’s the idea.  Fight fire with fire, I always say.   Anything that makes this much noise can’t be good for my environment.   I’m getting nervous, I can’t help myself,  I’m getting nervous.   I’m working myself up into a snit!  Grrrrrrr……chomp…..

When I mentioned we needed a diversion, I certainly wasn’t talking about a Rug Doctor machine.   One of the Little Women of Worsham Street loaned it to Slow after she’d finished using it in her house next door.   Slow decided that we needed “refreshing” and that she’d do it herself.   Bad idea.   Now I find moi banished to a rather uncomfortably warm front yard with the roar of a Rug Doctor roaming through my house.   Good Lord.  The woman has no sense of humor.   I was just trying to have a little fun with her.   Clearly, she was not amused.   The things I have to put up with.

When I said diversions, I was thinking more along the lines of a nice drive in the country.   Sigh.