So the old woman Slow sent me these pictures from the last couple of days of holiday festivities in South Carolina and I’m trying to figure out who misses moi most? H-E-L-L-O out there. Show me some LOVE, brothers and sisters…I’m feeling like the spy who came in from the cold only I’m not really IN yet, if you know what I mean. I seem to be on the OUTSIDE looking IN.
For example, here’s a picture of Tennis Ball Obsessed Chelsea playing with Smokey Lonesome Ollie with what appears to be a New Striped Baby that some Lucky Dogs got for Christmas in South Carolina this year. Well, well, well. Anybody missing The Red Man in this picture?? I’m not feeling it.
Oh, and could this be Pretty with one of her gifts at the Family Holiday Gathering on Christmas night? Sweet, Sweet Pretty, how can you be smiling like this when you know The Red Man is so far away? Okay, so it’s a genuine Al Gore signature. Big Deal. He never even got to be the Chief Peep of anything and that’s an inconvenient truth for sure. Maybe you’re just trying to be cheerful for the sake of the party…bravely hiding your genuinely sad feelings at my absence for the first time in eleven Christmases. Paw snaps! Exactly…I knew I could explain this picture. Smile on, Pretty, for the sake of the Party.
And finally we have the old woman Slow herself plopped down in her favorite chair in Casa de Canterbury and looking a bit too jolly to suit me. Does this look like a woman who’s remembering those Christmases when we were all together all the time? Who knew those were the Good Old Days?? That’s the problemo with the good old days – you don’t recognize them until they’re over. At any rate, Slow doesn’t appear to be thinking about The Red Man and Paw Licker Annie in this picture. Whatever.
Hmmmm…I’ve got a good idea. I think I’ll go piss on the baseboard in the hall. Vengeance is mine.
Well, Sports Fans, I’m calling it a night and will bid a final farewell to Santa Claus and his co-conspirators this year. Hope you’ve had good food and much merriment in the past few days. The Red Man will ring out the Old Year and ring in the New Year with you before you have time to turn around.
Thanks for hanging with us!