Save The Ta-Tas

I was on the road bright and early with the old woman Slow in the ancient Dodge Dakota this morning and didn’t know where we were going but I figured it wasn’t South Carolina since no pills had been packed and Paw Licker Annie was left behind which suited me just fine since moi had been the stay-at-home Pup yesterday while PLA went to God knows where with the old woman in the pickup truck. What goes around comes around, Paw Licker Annie. Enjoy your solo day on Worsham Street. You’ll have plenty of time for introspection. Paw snaps! I’ve got a great idea: Why don’t you lick a couple of paws for fun while we’re gone? Heh, heh. Cruelty joke.

So we’re driving east on Highway 105 and I spied the bumper sticker that said Save the Ta-Tas and I thought well, I never and then I thought well, why not? and then I thought well, you go, Sister Girl in your Honda car with your Bad Self. Why bother with saving whales, for example, when they’re so far away swimming in oceans and I probably won’t ever see one anyway and Ta-Tas are right here with us everywhere we look, if you catch my drift. And I vote to save them for sure. Get us a bumper sticker, old woman.

At any rate, we ended up in Beaumont visiting Aunt Nicey-Nice for the day. Aunt Nicey-Nice is older than Granny Selma who is older than dirt but Aunt NN is very clever and very much in her right mind, as opposed to Granny Selma’s wrong mind. Plus, she’s so pretty, too. Her one flaw is she isn’t much of a Pup Peep, but she isn’t obnoxious about it like a reformed smoker around smoke. Riding together in the cab of a pickup truck will make you forget your differences.

As a matter of fact, Aunt NN requested a name change today while we were visiting. She said she prefers Sweetie Pie to Nicey-Nice so I will honor her request and henceforth she will be known as Aunt Sweetie Pie, which is very appropriate since she loves a dessert as much as Slow and since she also makes the best chocolate meringue pie in the universe. Aunt Sweetie Pie it is. Amen.

So I’m back on Worsham Street tonight and glad to be out of the truck and away from the Country Legends blaring away on the radio. We came perilously close to making a detour on our way home to a little town called Winnie which is not far from Beaumont. Willie Nelson was performing at Nutty Jerry’s whatever that is. Yeah, the Ancient Pony-tailed Peep himself was On the Road Again but thank God the old woman can’t see to drive at night so we stayed on Highway 105 to get home by dark-thirty. Willie’s always on Slow’s mind along with Waylon and Hank and Johnny Cash and the gang…