Test Question for the night: What do you call a Peep who’s older than Granny Selma who’s older than dirt? A Centenarian. I thought that was a half horse-half man name. Whatever. If a Peep lives longer than 100 years, she’s a centenarian. Oh, I get it. Century = 100 years = centenarian. Ding, ding, ding! Paw Snaps! We have a winner here…no need to unveil any more letters, Vanna.
I remember when the Peep Weather Man Willard Scott used to wish the centenarians a big ol’ Happy Birthday on the Today show every morning. That was back in the day when only one or two Peeps made it to the century mark and the ones who did all lived in Florida. But then either Willard Scott quit doing the weather or we stopped watching the Today show but regardless of what happened, there’s centenarians running around all over the country now. Well, maybe not running around exactly. More like pushing walkers that roll VERY slowly, but there’s a ton of ’em.
The old woman Slow has a birthday this week and of course she won’t be a hundred yet, but she’s reaching full retirement age for Baby Boomers born in 1946 so that’s gettin’ up there. The Red Man wishes the daffy old twit a Happy Birthday and wants to offer the Key To Long Life. Note that I did not say the Fountain of Youth which she is WAY past at this point. Dorian Grey she is not.
A 101-year-old woman was asked the other day what she felt the secret was for living a long life. “Go with the flow, or to hell with it,” she answered. And that’s that. I’m afraid Slow has never been one to go with the flow in her first sixty-five years, but maybe it’s not too late for her to jump down from her soapboxes and let it ride. Go with the flow, old woman, and you may live to be a centenarian, if that interests you and I assume it does.
Get me outta here, Percy…passing out pearls of wisdom always makes me sleepy…