Conversation overheard VERY LATE last night at Casa de Canterbury as the old woman Slow and Pretty and Number One Son and Pretty Two were easing to a stop in Pretty’s car in front of the house after being gone for over SEVEN HOURS to visit Pretty’s Family in the Upstate for their annual family gathering in the Fellowship Hall of The First Baptist Church of Fingerville, South Carolina. Sweet Jesus.
Pretty says Who are those two boys standing on the front porch of our house at midnight?? Number One Son, are they friends of yours?
Number One Son says No I don’t know who they are. Pretty Two, do you recognize them?
Pretty Two says No I don’t have any idea who they are.
By this time, Slow and Pretty and Number One Son and Pretty Two are all opening car doors and getting out and trying to determine who the two young Male Peeps are when Pretty says I think they have a dog with them on our porch…it looks like they have a little dog…Oh My GOD it’s Red…they’ve got Red up there!!!
And then the old woman Slow starts moving very fast up the driveway to the house and Pretty is hollering at moi as I race away from my new best friends toward Pretty’s arms and everyone is talking all at once and there’s general pandemonium at Casa de Canterbury with lots of noise because then all the other Pups are Barking and throwing themselves against the windows like they do whenever anybody is standing on the front porch without Official Permission plus it’s late at night and you can see the lights coming on in the neighbors’ houses all around us as they try to figure out if they need to call the Police or anything like that and it’s like this Reality TV Show without the cameras.
Heh, heh. High drama. You gotta love it.
I swear I meet the nicest guys when I escape. Yep, my new best friend Tucker and his buddy told Slow and Pretty that they’d found me wandering along the road at the corner of Devonshire and Canterbury which was a good distance from our casa and that they’d been trying to call the number on my tag to locate the owner of such a cute little sweet dog. Ha. I would hardly call it “wandering” but I will say I was more than thrilled when they stopped to offer me a lift. I jumped right in their car and was happy for a ride, let me tell you. And give them credit – they HAD tried to call Slow’s number and I heard Tucker leave a message that he would be glad to keep me for the night if necessary. Thanks, but no thanks. I prefer my own king-sized bed if you don’t mind. And of course Slow can’t hear her own cell phone ring. Shit house mouse. Worthless.
So Slow unlocked the front door and she and Pretty rushed in to make sure no other dogs had gone AWOL and everyone was present and accounted for but then Pretty said well how did Red get out and walked through the house and into the back yard and discovered my little secret. Oops – the back yard gate next to the garage was wide open. Open Sesame – Open Gates – Open Roads and I’m Gone. I wish I could tell you how that gate opened but if I did I’d have to kill you. Plus I have no idea. I’ve jumped on that gate for years and it’s never opened but last night I gave it a little push and Poof it swung open like it does when Slow takes the garbage out. Paw Snaps – it was just that easy. Their bad. I was off and runnin’.
Now here’s a question for you, Amigos. Why was The Red Man the only Pup in the Pack who took off on the Thanksgiving Adventure Walk? There was equal opportunity for the other ones to leave since we all use the same doggie door and the back gate was Wide Open. Well, I can answer that for you. They don’t have S-p-u-n-k – not a one of them has Spunk. If you’re not the Lead Dog, you always have the same view, don’t you, and The Red Man needs a different view periodically.
So all’s well that ends well and my new best friend Tucker came over again today because Slow called him to say she’d made some of her famous chocolate chip cookies for him for rescuing me one more time and I gave him a friendly bark as he drove away. See you again, Big Guy and thanks for the ride home last night. Sweet.
There you have it. One more Daring Escape by The Red Man and one Giant Paw for the Pups. This is how we punish the Peeps for spending the evening at The First Baptist Church of Fingerville.
Only in South Carolina
Get me outta here Percy…Thought for the night Sports Fans: No matter where you wander, there’s no place like home…and you can quote me on that…
Hey Red! Poppy here! Ma’s snoozing at the keyboard, so I’m taking this chance to say,”Wowzer, bowzer, you’re one clever, wanderin’ dude. Impressive! But, good thing you met Tucker. Imagine if you didn’t get home in time for a spot on the bed? Bet Slow’s clamping down on you for a bit. Lock down is always rough…sigh…Well, I’m just glad you got home safe and sound ’cause I’d miss you if you took up the traveling life for good.
Hey Poppy – gosh you’re up awfully late tonight but you’re young so it’s ok!! Yes, I have to say I usually run up on a nice Peep when I follow my wanderlust and I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t…maybe keep runnin’ all the way to Pennsylvania to see you!! You’re one CUTE Pup – love your new sweaters BTW…classy.
Ma will take you in if you do Red! She won’t scold, but will give you lasagna or something like that. But I tell you she’s sneaky. She’ll let Slow know before you curl up for a nap 😀
Hmmm…lasagna…now that’s one of my favorites…I hope she has garlic bread with it? And of course you’d have the Mom that tells on you to other Moms. Geez Louise. 🙂
Can you believe it? And this dog is 12 years old…seriously.
hope u had a wonderful Thanksgiving!
Yes, thank you very much – it was very good!!
Oh, Red! You clever little boy! I’m glad you had a wonderful adventure, but even gladder you got home safe! 😉
If I could make this stuff up, I’d write a novel!! 🙂
Hahaha – truth is stranger than fiction 😉
Where Red is concerned…for sure…:)