Greetings, Amigos in Australia and Tennis Sports Fans everywhere on the planet – The Red Man and his Pack and Peeps are tunin’ up for some Tennis down under, if you catch my drift, and we’re always excited when the Australian Open rolls around every year. It goes a long way to helpin’ us get our groove back in the dreary wet and cold winter weather on Worsham Street in the middle of January when we can watch sunny summer festivities in Melbourne with its blue skies and short tennis skirts and lots of excitable fans.
Big Time Tennis at The Australian Open
So just to update you…Pretty is the Real Deal tennis player in the familia which is Spanish for family. She has an official Rating and everything and she’s been playing tennis for a very long time and still plays every chance she gets when she’s not workin’ at the Mast General Store. She is bona fide — as opposed to the old woman Slow who played tennis in high school a hundred years ago when they had these little wooden rackets they used to whack the balls around with. Shit house mouse. That must be like the Dark Tennis Ages. All she does now is Spectate, but you have to admire her faithfulness. She’s glued to ESPN coverage and don’t mess with her when she’s photographing the TV if you value your life. Pretty calls Slow the Ansel Adams of TV photography. Heh, heh.
Roger Federer is Pretty’s Favorite Player – Interviewed Either Today or Tomorrow
( The F on his cap stands for Federer )
Chris Evert and the Good McEnroe Brother at the Rod Laver Arena
Interviewing Roger Federer
Which way did he go?
Americans – what do they know about tennis?
Obviously not so much
They don’t even know which direction to look for me
Slow’s Favorite won’t be playin’ this year. The old girl loves Rafael Nadal who doesn’t have an R on his cap for Rafa because he doesn’t wear a cap. Nope, Rafa wears a head band that matches the color of his tennis outfit whenever he plays and no cap. He was supposed to play in the Australian Open but caught a stomach virus instead. Hey, here’s a paw snap and twirl for you Rafa from The Red Man who also doesn’t wear a cap with the letter R. Get well soon, Fiery Spaniard – the game misses you and so does moi!
Serena Williams Press Conference Following Her First-Round Match
Either Yesterday or the Day Before
If they ask me that same question one more time…
(She rolled in straight sets after a scary ankle injury in the first set)
I apologize in advance for my editor’s inability to keep her days straight with the time differentials – of course she really can’t keep anything straight. Heh, heh.
One of the best matches in round one was a four-setter between the Frenchman Monfils and Dolgopolov from The Ukraine.
Gael Monfils Moves On to Round Two
Get me outta here Percy…I have to watch Sam Stosur the Aussie play Zheng of China…of course we’re pullin’ for Stosur every time…and I think it’s LIVE but does anybody really know what day it is?