The State Of The Best In Show

The Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show!!!

Awards Season brings out the Best for all of us, and The Red Man’s personal Favorite Big Dog Show is the annual WKC Dog Show in the Big Apple….ahhhh…New York, New York….

Brightest lights, Biggest City in the USA

And what a final night we’re expectin’ as the Judges pick BEST IN SHOW!!  The Red Man is on pins and needles and can barely contain his excitement!!  Paw Snaps!!  Twirls!!  BARKi n g…g…a…l…o…r……e……..

Hey, excuse me, but what’s this?   These aren’t the right JUDGES

Earth to old woman Slow – have you lost your friggin’ mind????   What’s that you say?  The Peep-in-Chief’s State of the Union address is on at the same time as my WKC Awards?  Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.   I can read the Cliff’s Notes on those remarks tomorrow at Tara, if you don’t mind.   Geez Louise.

Baron – Great Pyrenees

Now, then…that’s settled…hey Baron, you’re lookin’ good Bro, but I doubt you’ll make it past the judges.  Too white.  Too good a stance.  Too perfect…not a chance in hell.

No, I didn’t say I wanted to see WHITE PEEPS, you idiot

Besides which, the Peep-in-Chief isn’t totally white, so you blew it anyway.  I said Baron was too white to win the Best in Show.  Shit house mouse.  The Daffy old twit can’t hear a thing.

Lookin’ Good Girl

No No No – I NEVER said the guy sittin’ down looked like a Hound

Oh for God’s sake.  I give up, but I can tell you for sure she’s in for trouble when the Oscars come around this year.   Yeah, let’s see how she likes it when The Red Man switches channels on her.  Better still, maybe I’ll talk Spike into one of his nonstop barking sprees when they announce Best Actress.   Hah.  Revenge is sweet.

The Red Man votes for Swagger for Best in Show

But I could be just as happy with the German wire-haired pointer

And the Best in Show Award goes to … 

Flip it back Flip it Back Flip it Baaaaccccckkkkk…dear God, I missed it.   Sigh.  I heard it was the little dog named Banana Joe.  Good for him, but I hate to say it his name reminds me of a clothing store.  Sorry, Swagger.  Damn.  I never pick the winner.

Evidently she does

Get me outta here Percy…I feel like I’ve been split into more realities tonight than that woman Eve in the old movie had Faces…where’s my Rimadyl?