Well Amigos, you’d think we’d have PLENTY of room in the comfy king-sized bed at Casa de Canterbury without you-know-who, but think again.
The old woman Slow has her days and nights mixed up, and we don’t know when she will need her place so we have to huddle at the bottom of the bed to be prepared for the pile- on.
Tonight she self-medicated with her grandmother’s tried and true mixture of honey, lemon juice and bourbon heated in a pan on the stove and poured quickly into a shot glass and downed in a gulp. The Red Man has observed that the measurement proportions appear to be shifting from equal to light on the lemon juice and heavier on the bourbon as the dosages increase. I’m just saying.
Regardless, still more coughing and coughing. Restlessness.
Next, she took her two Aleves for her regular arthritis and sciatica pains – followed by her controlled substance drug of choice, ambien. Usually, this will ease her into dreamland, but not tonight.
Continued coughing and now Pretty is awake, too. The Red Man is awake, Spike is awake, Pretty is unhappily awake – and Chelsea has left the bed for the sofa downstairs.
Entonces which is Spanish for then, Slow gets up and heads for the medicine cabinet and reaches for the Big Gun. Nyquil. Ignoring the label about too much acetaminophen can kill you or worse, she pours the cap full and chugs it. I feel like I’m at a fraternity party.
So I told her we might as well write something since we’re up anyway. So here we are in the middle of the night sending an appeal to all of our cyber space Sports Fans for any suggestions for curing the cough and knocking out the daffy old twit.
This is our second night with this problemo which is Spanish for problem and frankly, my dears, I’m forced to give a damn since her cough is both annoying and leads to my own sleep deprivation.
Get me outta here Percy…it’s a full moon and I’m wide awake. Heads are going to roll.
P.S. She must be reaching an altered state now – she’s had to look up how to spell acetaminophen three times. Finally she brought the Nyquil bottle to the computer and after checking the spelling one more time, took another swig of the green vileness for good luck. Oh yeah, beam her up, Scotty.
I take Ambien too, a small dose. I just took mine and am up writing a Ronnie Dunn post, but I think it’s bordering on not making sense.
Oh, you take the same poison I do, PLGCM! That’s a fun factoid to know. I knew we had much in common, but a fellow ambien aficionado makes us soul brothers! I usually avoid the computer when I’m in an altered state because I fear the “bordering on not making sense” syndrome, but last night I convinced myself I was wide awake!!
P.S. I am a follower of your blog, but I’m not sure I get emails when you post.
OMC Redman and Clan, that sounds like a serious flu of Ol’Slow. Well, Let’s hope she’ll be better soon, so you guys get some sleep. Sending Healing Pawkisses, that may help 🙂
Thanks so much for the Healing Pawkisses, Granny – we are sure they will help!! 🙂
Entonces or “atunci” which is the Romanian counterpart, you might try the onion tea. I am not a fan, but most people say it works. Otherwise, just overdose the cough syrup and it should go away. I am not aware of cough drugs over there which are different from what we have across the pond, but stick with the syrup and eucalyptus candies
Ah, Cristina Popa, the old woman is so in the dark she has no idea what onion tea or eucalyptus candies even are over here across the pond. Maybe we’ll have to send her to Romania for “the cure!” Thanks for the suggestions – we’ll send Pretty on an expedition to find!
Either boil that onion or do the black radish with some honey, it will do wonders 🙂
I think I will give boiling the onion a try and would have to mix that with honey since I have no idea what a black radish is!! You’re the best, Cristina Popa!
AFter the bourbon an the Nyquil I’m surprised you could get Slow to stay up and write, Red. But maybe she has a strange reaction to Nyquil and it acts like caffeine. I’m pretty sure it’s the devil anyway.
It’s the devil somewhere, Luanne! I have to say I’m not sure how reliable she’ll be for a few days anyway. Honestly, the help you have to put up with these days. 🙂
Be patient with her. She’s only human.
Oh Luanne, sometimes I forget!! 🙂
While struggling to make her bed just moments ago, Ma stop and dramatically announced to her canine audience she had a premonition Slow was sick with the flu. As soon as she revs up the laptop she will provide you with her recipe for disaster … Er, I mean recovered health (Not that I can see it’s doing her much good – we should invest in Kleenex or something!!!).
Aha Miss Poppy, we figured your Ma would be able to save the day for any malady Slow has!! 🙂
Okay, here we go with my Cold Tea recipe. It helps a little and depending on how much booze you add at the end, it does help both clear you out and knock you out:
1 piece of ginger 1″ diameter cut into quarters – just slice off the skin or don’t bother peeling; you’re sick after all
1 small dried chili pepper or a hunk of fresh
1 or 2 cloves of garlic smashed
1 or 2 wedges of lemon or lime
A shot or two of gin (my favorite, but tequila works just as well)
Boil 12 to 16 oz of water. Put all but the lemon and gin in a bowl. Pour the water over and steep for 5 minutes covered. Drain into a mug. Add the lemon and gin.
An alternate method is to have Pretty pick you up a carton of Swanson’s Thai Ginger infused broth, add some coconut milk to that, then down it with your favorite chaser.
Get well soon!!!
Love and hugs from a great distance away so you don’t get my germs too,
I thought of two more that were my father’s favorites. He had absolutely no tolerance for coughing fits in his offspring, so children of the 50’s that we were, he dosed us with booze. Booze for colic, booze for bronchitis, booze for the occasional sinus infection – my father’s cure all for peace and quiet within his domain.
Warm up a quantity of rum and mix with the juice of one lemon and a tablespoon of sugar.
Rock and Rye – either the kind with rock sugar in it, or Dad’s favorite, the one with fruits. This he would make further palatable with a tablespoon of maraschino cherry juice, but that’s not necessary. 🙂
Live it up Sheila. You only get one or two bad ones a year!!!
Are you sick, too?? Let’s go for the gusto and try your dad’s recipes!!
Thanks so much for sending the ideas – I think I’ll go try one now!!
Take care of yourself, too – holidays on the way and all…
Paw Snaps and Twirls to you and your clan,
Wow! This is some kind of recipe, and I am wondering if you really have all the ingredients on hand to make this concoction?? I think I will send Pretty to look for the Swanson’s Thai Ginger infused broth -if we can possibly find a store in Columbia, South Carolina that carries it…hmmm…I think I’ll choose your dad’s recipe – it’s very similar to the one my grandmother used. Honey, lemon and “whiskey” warmed up and served hot. It was the only time the “whiskey” bottle could be opened in her house. My poor grandfather. I think he pretended he was sick sometimes just to get a shot of bourbon for his nerves. 🙂
Oh, yes, I’m sick too – a cold on top of getting Lyme disease once again. I hate, HATE ticks!!!
Yes indeed, I do have most of the ingredients on hand. I love to cook and most of them are kitchen staples. I mean, with my last name, there better be a BIG supply of garlic in the pantry at all times! Yes, your grandma’s recipe does sound similar to Pop’s – served for medicinal purposes only, of course. 😀 I think the Rye in Rock and Rye must be rye whiskey. You would think we were big guzzlers, but usually only for special occasions and sick kids. Pop would be in jail if he raised this generation of kids, but then so would many boomer parents. I do believe bourbon is best for nerves, so I’m right there with your grandfather.
Please do try one or more of my concoctions, but mostly take it easy, rest up and be well. We need our strength to tackle the Holiday goodies.
Hugs and loves,
Ann and the Four-legged Gang
What’s this you say??? Lyme disease again??? Oh, I didn’t know that and am so sorry to hear it. Wow – that’s really a bummer for you to get it again. I think you need to brew up a batch of your own meds to handle it this time. And of course you will have all the necessary ingredients on hand! I sometimes forget there are people in this world who actually know how to cook!!!
All of us at Casa de Canterbury will be sending our warmest wishes for your speedy return to good health!! Bless your heart, as we say in the South. 🙂
Sheila and the Pack
I am, what one of my girlfriend’s calls me, a “tick magnet!” Ah, well, it’s that old animal attraction, only I wish it wasn’t to the 8-legged variety. Lyme’s has slowed me down considerably, but am finally starting to feel a bit better – able to sit upright for an hour or two to draw a little yesterday. A great improvement over the last week or so.
‘Tis the season to sniffle, snork, cough, and ache, so I am imbibing in my cures.
Do get well, Sheila and don’t pass it on to poor Pretty!!!
Hugs and love,
Ann and Company
Hahahaha! “tick magnet” rather than “chick magnet” Too Funny!!! So glad you are feeling better this week!!
Yes, here’s to egg nog, mimosas and mango margaritas!!
Take care of yourself, too,
Sheila and the Pack
Has she come down from the ceiling yet Red Man?
Yes, but she took her meds so early last night that we’re all up at the crack of dawn today. Pretty floated by and asked if there was a party she didn’t know about and then went back to bed. Pretty’s smart.