South Carolina Gamecocks had NEVER beaten
In-state archrivals Clemson Tigers five years in a row…
…so the old woman Slow was sipping a COCK-tail pre-game
and feeling frisky and hoping to capture Win Number Five last night
The Red Man can’t look at her. Geez Louise. When will it end?
Clemson Coach can’t watch, either.
The Old Ball Coach Spurrier likes to watch
as the Gamecocks beat the Tigers 34 to 17 for Fifth Straight Win!
Well Sports Fans, quite a night at Casa de Canterbury as Pretty and Slow coughed and wheezed and thoroughly entertained themselves by watching the final regular season football game from the best bleacher seats ESPN could provide. Neither one of them has been worth a damn for the past two weeks since they’ve been sick with their Epizootey Epidemic so I suppose I shouldn’t begrudge them a little bit of fun. Honestly, nothing separates a couple of lesbians from their football – not even the Epizootey – but they do work The Red Man’s last nerve with all that hollering and cussing the officials, camera flashes, blah, blah, blah.
Senior QB Connor Shaw MVP – he ran, he passed, he executed
QB with most wins in school history – never lost a game at home in 3 seasons
The Red Man’s personal favorite Jadeveon Clowney had a Big Night, too and made his final appearance at Williams Brice Stadium in front of 80,000+ fans a night the Tiger QB won’t soon forget.
The Clowney Man Cometh
Football is an American team sport played with eleven men on offense and eleven men on defense and eleven men on special teams plus a whole bunch of back-up guys who keep running on and off the field from the bench plus an army of coaches and trainers and a gazillion wild and crazy Fanatics who support their favorite teams every week at various levels – all focused on seeing which group of guys can get an oblong pigskin from one end of a field to the other without being intercepted or fumbling. At least, that’s how The Red Man sees it.
Coach Spurrier is all smiles as the Gamecocks end their regular season at 10 – 2
and continue Home Wins record-breaking Streak at No 17
The Red Man sends Paw Snaps and Twirls to Connor Shaw and Jadeveon Clowney and salutes the entire Gamecock football team for a great season, but he has to give credit where credit is due – and the MVP for the year goes to the Old Ball Coach Steve Spurrier who knows football… but doesn’t know fear.
Get me outta here Percy…I swear the daffy old twit is about to watch this game again…Fear the Recording…
Red's Rants and Raves 
Ah, Red Man, you have to put up with so much! I don’t understand why they have to put all that white on their uniforms, thus confusing me because it makes them look a little like SOONERS (not as beautiful, but close). Maybe you could ask Slow for me why they use that white. I even looked them up and they are supposed to be GARNET & BLACK.
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Very good point, Luanne. During the 40-something years Slow has followed the Gamecocks they have worn many variations of Garnet and Black and of course, white. Apparently there is little rhyme or reason to the selection of uniforms on any given game day so we just have to say it must be left up to the whims of the Head Coaches. Actually, we even saw them wear GREY uniforms at an Away game at LSU – so go figure.
Your loyalty to the Sooners is admirable in a season like this one. Ah. They will rise again. They always do. 🙂
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Well, well Red Man my love! You have explained the game so well in a few brief sentences that Ma exclaimed, “So that’s what it’s all about!” Thereby lifting a veil of ignorance 53 years in the making. Somehow I don’t see her dropping her knitting needles to take up a new interest. Though at least she now “gets” what all the hollering and foot stamping is about. 😉
We hope the girls are feeling better for their victory. The Epizootey is bound to give up it’s grip eventually.
Hugs,
Your Poppy
(Oh yeah, and Cassie Potatoes … And, I guess Ma … Sigh …)
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So glad Ma is on board with the football program, albeit lukewarmly. 🙂 Actually I would encourage her to keep the knitting needles handy if she ever finds a team she likes. She might find other uses for them. 🙂
Slow has made yet another trip to the drug store this afternoon in search of new remedies for Pretty who has lost patience with being sick. You might want to say she’s sick and tired of it. Heh, heh. My little joke for the afternoon.
We hope you are all avoiding ticks like the plague. Good health is tricky in any state.
Paw Snaps and Twirls to all of you,
Your Red Man
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HURRAY COCKS……….
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Thanks Church Organist!! Yes, big night for the Cocks!!
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