Dear God it’s been a Weekend on Worsham, let me tell you. I’m exhausted and it’s only Saturday night or I think it’s Saturday night but I’m not sure what day it is or what time it really is since the Peeps are changing time and putting an hour in a bottle tonight at some point. Mercy. What won’t they think up next? Hey, fools – don’t mess with Father Time or Mother Nature, please. It’s not nice and they don’t like it.
Last night we had the Lake Conroe Cousins playing Canasta at our house with the old woman Slow and one of the Little Women of Worsham Street and of course since Prohibition has long since been dead, alcohol was served and the Peeps made merry on into the night. My nerves were teetering on the brink by the time the festivities were over and the LCC made their way out the door.
Just when I thought I was about to recover another carload of Peeps showed up this morning from Rosenberg and they all piled out for a visit. Well, one of the Peeps opened the front gate to hold it open for the Old One who had to be helped from the car and you’re not going to believe this I know you won’t really believe this but The Red Man was so startled to see the front gate open I couldn’t run away like I normally would. Nosirree, I passed over to the Freedom Driveway and stood and looked in the direction of my usual runaway destinations Highway 105 and Jim’s Hardware but I was so hung over from the alcohol fumes last night I didn’t even bother to bolt. By the time Slow realized what was going on and grabbed me I actually didn’t mind. Weird, huh? Was it the alcohol or a deeper metaphysical moment? Shit house mouse. Who cares?
Apparently the Old One was a friend of Granny Selma and the whole group had come to go see GS in her new digs in Willis. So they all four trooped into Worsham and then turned around and trooped out, I guess. I’m really not sure what they did since Slow escorted me to the back yard and left Mr. Nicey-Nice Smokey Lonesome Ollie in the front with our guests. Whatever, Dude. You are such a Suck Up. I have my Dog Dignity intact, thank you very much. Don’t bother with a report, either. I heard Slow talking to Pretty on the phone tonight about the visit so I have ALL the details I need which brings me to tonight.
The night has been a disaster. Slow has been a wreck watching the hapless Gamecocks play the resourceful Razorbacks in a football game. So emotional. Such passion. Such LANGUAGE. I can’t believe my ears.
Bad night for the Old Bald Coach. Won’t mention the score, but let’s just say I hope none of my Sports Fans had money on the Cocks tonight. U-G-L-Y. How bad was it? It was so bad I left the room to Slow and another Little Woman from Worhsam Street who had the misfortune of watching the game with the old woman. Hate it for you. Turns out you CAN lick our Cocks. Heh, heh. My desperate attempt to lift my own spirits.
And so I bid farewell to Friday night and Saturday and suppose I will spend my additional Hour of Time on my back with my paws in the air. Get me outta here, Percy – Father Time marches on and Mother Nature is hot on his heels!!
Catch you later, Sports Fans – stay tuned.