Well, can I tell you I am mortified with the latest developments in the Missing Baby Jesus in the Nativity Scene Saga…absolutely wrecked.

The Preacher Peep at the Bearded One and Organ Player’s Church has confessed at prayer meeting this evening to a massive scandal that rocked the congregation of twelve Peeps who innocently came to pray for the sick and shut-ins.   When the Organ Player Cousin suggested adding the Missing Baby Jesus to the Prayer List tonight, the Preacher Peep said he wouldn’t recommend it.   Nope, nope, nope.   He was pretty sure God wouldn’t be answering that prayer this year.   Actually, to be honest about the whole situation, he continued, the Baby Jesus had been stolen LAST Christmas and the Decorating Committee put up the Nativity Scene without it again this year thinking no one would miss it since you can’t see up in there too well.   Of course, who could have predicted the Bearded One Cousin killing time smoking a cigarette before the Sunday service and taking a closer look at the NS than was intended.   Shit house mouse.   There’s one in every crowd.

A collective gasp from the stunned congregation followed the minister’s confession since it turns out none of the Decorating Committee comes to the prayer meeting on Wednesdays and the Peeps who were there didn’t know the Baby Jesus was missing.   Thank you, Organ Player Cousin for bringing it to everyone’s attention.   You’re very musical for sure.   You’re even a Whistle Blower.   Heh, heh.   My little joke for the night.

So, Sports Fans, it looks like the Peep Cousins’ church Nativity Scene has a recurring problemo and the Bearded One maintains his theory that the thieves will burn in hell.   I am personally convinced it’s not too late to contact Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson to recover Baby Jesus and his cradle.   It may be a Cold Case, but she’s the one I’d be praying to for answers.   In the mean time, I think I’ll take this opportunity to go for a Final Call in the front yard and gaze across Worsham Street to the First Place Winner’s house before I call it a night.   Catch you later on…